i would like to know if im allowed to trim or shave my bodily hair since it really bothers me. in addition i believe it bothers my wife as well although shes kind enough not to mention clearly.
Hair removal from parts of the body which are generally only done by women is prohibited. Even if it is bothersome and preferable to your wife this prohibition remains. Chest hair which is exclusive to men may be trimmed, without a razor. Only when hair growth is causing a medical issue or great embarrassment may it be removed, in a way otherwise prohibited.
Shulchan Aruch Yoreh Deah 182