Question:

Hello

I was recently called foe shidduch information about a guy that I know from yeshiva. The caller asked if I would consider him a considerate person. I wouldn’t describe this guy as considerate and I feel he is sometimes a little inconsiderate. How should I go about answering these types of questions when they specifically ask about a trait that is not the persons strong point?

Answer:

It sounds like this person is not terribly inconsiderate, but rather this is not the trait he excels in. In that case the safest thing would be to say just that, I don’t see him as an exceptionally considerate person, rather closer to average. It is not clear that slightly inconsiderate is a fault which should be shared as is, as it could be taken out of context.

 

Sources:

See here for an extensive discussion on this topic and it’s ramifications in halacha.

 

Tags: shidduchim

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