Question:

A and B are brothers. their parents are C and D. A lives out of town and is currently struggling with parnasah. he is hesitant to move back to his hometown where his parents C and D and his brother B reside because in the past his parents have been overbearing. A tells B that this is to be kept in confidence and B obliges. B attests to A that over the past few years this overbearing nature has disappeared and B who also used to experience this issue l no longer has this problem and lives very nicely with C and D. B is convinced if he discusses this with his parents C and D they will be very mindful to be sensuitive to this issue. c and D also want very much for A to move back home as he has a great opportunity of parnasha among other benefits by moving back home. is there any way for B to somehow verbalize this to C and D in order to solve this conflict?

Answer:

This is very nice and thoughtful of you to be so concerned for your brother’s welfare. On the other hand, you can’t be sure that you brothers feeling will be the same as yours. He might feel that nevertheless, the C and D will be overbearing to him. Therefore the best thing is to get your brothers permission. You can explain to him that thinks have changed, and that you will be able to explain things to your parents in a way that will not be insulting to them, “I have a feeling that this is why he is hesitant to move back home…”. This way his confidence will not be broken, and you will now if he is interesting in doing such a move.

Best Wishes

 

Tags: lashon hora

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