Question:

I wrote things about Torah observance that are wrong and misleading and wrote about idolatrous practices as if they are equally valid. My writing went very far and can not be taken back. It was quoted in many places. It is available online and in print. I am deeply sorry. There is no way to undo what I did, only not to do it again. I also used to say things verbally and I spread wrong ideas. I am sorry. I don’t know what to do. How will Hashem relate to me now? Is my relationship with Hashem damaged? I am afraid of what I did and I feel like I constantly need to hide from it the best I can and not let people know it was me. I’m scared and embarrassed.

Answer:

I hear your concern, and you have already moved on from these practices, and you want to make amends for what was done. From the past, my assumption is that you already did the three parts of teshuva correctly and that you are not going to return to doing things like that again. One of the ways of rectifying a chillul H-shem is to make a Kiddush H-shem. It can be in action, in words, or even by the example that you show to other people. If you have a talent for writing things, then you can write articles that are a Kiddush H-shem, and that bring people closer to Judaism.

Tags: Chilul Hashem Teshuva

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