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Going to a close friend’s son’s aufruf

Question:

Going to a close friend’s son’s aufruf

1. The kiddush in shul – not a sit down.
2. A luncheon with several tables.

Answer:

My apologies that it took so long to get back toyou as i was away for a short while. Regarding your questions-

  1. Regarding your kiddush, since it is not a sit down affair and is short and temporary, it is permitted.
  2. Regarding the luncheon that is more problematic, since it is a sit down meal. However depending on the specific circumstrances it might be permitted, since it is shabbos. If you are such a close friend that it would be expected for you to be at the meal, and your not being there will be like making an announcment that it is because your in aveilus, then it would be permitted.  If  you do go to the meal, it is good for you to let people know that it is because your are such a close friend… so it shouldn’t sppear to some poeople as if you are doing something that you shouldn’t. However if the circumstances are not that way then you shouldn’t go.

Sources:

Conversation with R’ Leshinsky shlit”a

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