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Behavior on Purim (drunkeness/smoking/clothing)

I am 13 years old. I am going collecting with my friends, but they all are getting dead drunk, smoking,  and setting off fireworks. Is it a mitzvah to get dead drunk, and does doing so override chilul hashem? I want to go with my friend, but not in a manner of chilul hashem.

Also, is it OK to smoke on purim–my class says it is, but I heard yom kipur is kipurim, so I dont see why you can kill yourself.

Another question is about beged isha: I saw a man wearing his mother’s wedding gown last year. Is that muttar?

Last but not least: What is the story with limos? I heard from my rebbaim some say ausur and some say muttar.

Answer:

1. Although there is a mitzvah to get drunk on Purim, this applies to Purim in the day, and not in the night, when most go collecting. The mitzvah is to get drunk, but not ‘dead drunk’, and it does not override chilul Hashem, so that for boys going round streets, where a chilul Hashem is likely to be caused, it would not be permitted to lose control (and your concern over this issue is well placed). Some authorities write that rather than actually getting drunk, it is better to drink a little more than usual, causing oneself to fall asleep out of slight tipsiness. Others write that one should actually get drunk, but not, as mentioned, at the expense of chilul Hashem.

2. Of course, it is never permitted to kill oneself. Those who smoke on Purim presumably believe that smoking one day a year will not kill them. This might be true, but it is not recommended to smoke at all, because cigarettes on Purim can lead to cigaretted during the year. The issue of chilul Hashem is also relevant here (smoking religious thirteen-year-olds does not make a good impression!).

3. Some authorities permit the wearing of beged isha as part of the Purim festivities (see Mahari Mintz 17; Rema 696:8). Others prohibit this (see Yereim 96 (though there might be room to distinguish); Yad Ketanah, lo taaseh 56:82). Although Mishnah Berurah criticizes the practice (696:30), those who do it have upon whom to rely.

4. Please clarify this question, which I did not understand.

A freilichen Purim!

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