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Validity of Conversions

A jewish man had an intimate relationship with a non-Jew. He told her that he can only marry a Jew.

I told the “former” friend that the giur/conversion would not be valid, because the person desires physical pleasure, emotional and intellectual support, but not Torah and Hashem. Plus, if a Jew sinned with her, the instrument of sin can not be rewarded.

She completed Orthodox giur. Yet, I believe that material aspect was of importance, and not love for Torah. It is a delicate matter, but what is the truth?

A second man lived with a non-Jewish woman and she married him because his family is rich, and converted, but their children are so violent. The eldest beats up his brother and sister, and uses words such as: “I kill you. I hate you. I wish you were dead.” (I have 2 witnesses). Those are not Jewish neshamot. Please teach me halacha. With respect.

Answer:

Although the halachah is that somebody who wishes to convert for the purpose of marriage is not accepted, once he undergoes an Orthodox conversion by a certified and reliable Beis Din, the conversion is valid. There are also cases where a Beis Din will accept a potential convert for giur, even when marriage is an issue.

Therefore, in both cases the conversion is fine, and the children will be fully Jews (with Jewish neshamot!).

The fact that a person sinned with a woman is not reason that she cannot convert, and that they cannot continue to live together after the conversion. A similar case is found in the Gemara (Menachos 44), where the Gemara concludes that a relationship that was initially forbidden became permitted.

The Gemara mentions that non-Jewish converts are liable to introduce a range of character traits into the nation. Of course, there is no shortage of badly behaved Jews, so that one cannot know where negative behavior comes from, and we can hope that the children’s behavior will improve as they mature.

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