im in the year after my father and im finding it very hard not to listen to music in the car as i travel 100 miles daily and cant follow shuirim or speeches being stopped all the time with buisness.
please advise if there is any way i can listen to music in my car just to help me pass the time smoothly.
You should listen to music that is not lively dance music, rather slower songs, chazzanus, classical music and the like.
See Chut Shani (vol. 4) and Halichos Shlomo (p. 361, 412), who write that not all music is prohibited, but only music that is geared towards joy (see Rav Neventzal in the name of Rav Shlomo Zalman Auerbach, in Yerushalayim U-Moadehah, p. 293; others however, are more stringent, in your case of need you may rely on the lenient opinions).