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Shidduchim and mental illness


I have a close friend which I have known for many years and I want to set her up with potential shidduchim bh. However, she was diagnosed with bipolar disorder and has been on medication and been stable for many many years without any breakdowns bh. I would like to know what is the best way to let the other side know of her health issue (when, what to say, etc). She is a very capable person, responsible, caring, patient, etc and has no problem raising a family bh. Must she only be set up with people who have this issue? Thank you and Tizkou lemitzvot!


From a halachic standpoint she doesn’t have to only marry someone with the same condition as her, and your friend can be set up with anyone who will agree to marry someone with such a condition. The fact that she has the disorder must be said, however it is practical to mention it, after the person she is dating gets to know her a little bit, but before the relationship has a chance to develop into something serious. This is usually at around the third date, (in the USA where they reach such a point at around the third date). Regarding who much has to be said, they have to told clearly that she is bipolar, and the person should be given the opportunity to check into the issue well, such as speaking to her doctor etc.


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