in benching after al yichasreinu there is an option to say a tefilla for the baal habayis. should one say this for his spouse?
It is not customary to say the horachamon for a spouse, as this is a special blessing that a guest says for the host when he leads the zimun. There is however a horachamon in bentching that is said for a spouse.
Shuchan Aruch O:Ch 201-1.