My mother in law is coming to town. I dont like how she intereacts with our kids sometimes. I want to know if I can halachically discuss my discomforts with my husband, before the fact and after the fact. (We used to talk openely about family until we learned more about hilchos loshon hora) Do I have to be unemotional about it if I can?
Discussing this is for the toeles and upbringing of your children and it is permitted. You can discuss this the same way other toeles things are discussed.
You don’t have to be unemotional, but you can let your emotions make you exaggerate what happened, and the potential dangers.