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Grandmother during sheloshim at grandchild’s vort

Question:

Can a women in Avelus still in the shloshim for her father go to a granddaughters vort and if yes can she have a manicure and get her face done for the vort?

Answer:

Hamakom yinachem eschem btoch shar aveilei Tzion v’Yerushalayim.

A person in aveilus, even a grandparent has to minimize the amount of time that is spent at the vort. She can go to the vort, and even wear a shabbos dress (not very fancy) but she shouldn’t stay the whole time. She can walk around and nosh a little bit here and there. She should not dance, or be there when there is music being played.  Regarding having a facial, that would seems alright, but the manicure is problematic because an avel doesn’t cut nails during shloshim.

As a side point, there is a good chance that she is not in shloshim. If the shiva was over before Rosh Hashana, even if the day she got up was in the morning of erev Rosh Hashana, since she is considered to have started shloshim, then Rosh Hashana cancels the shloshim, and she is considered to be during the year of aveilus, and a manicure would be permitted. Even if Rosh Hashana canceled the shiva, Yom Kippur will cancel the shloshim, so if the vort is after Yom Kippur, it is also considered as if she is in the year, and not shloshim.

Have a gmar chasima tova, and a year of besuros tovos and a refuah shleima to all.

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