For donations Click Here

Dad leaves in the middle of havdalah


Dear Rabbi,

I waited for three stars tonight but ten minutes before even one, dad demanded profane I do the ritual. He speaks to me as I deserve no family or care.

Dad set me while it was yet full twilight and I read the prayers. I had less support because the holy words were yet not indicated spoken.

My dad is hugh but hates things spelled out to him. The bug nerves me. How do I include family when they demand rituals be destructive. This is not fair to the son I retort strong.



I enjoy this question of yours. It isn’t easy dealing with parents who have very little tolerance for our religious practices, but you are doing great!

Technically, you can do the ritual earlier than before he three stars come out, however you may not light a candle then, and you should wait to do any non- Shabbos things. You can do the ritual without saying the blessing over the fire, and later on in the evening make the blessing over the fire.

Best wishes


Leave a comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *