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Before a second marriage is it okay to talk and meet regularly until the chuppah?

Question:

Before a second marriage is it okay to talk and meet regularly until the chuppah?

 

Answer:

The Ashkenazi custom is that the chosson and kallah do not meet or talk for the week or two before the wedding. The reason for this is because of something called “dam chimud”. The possibility that she saw something as a result of excitment before the wedding. Therefore the two don’t meet or speak in order to minimize such an occurance. The rules regarding dam chimud apply to all women, even if it is a second marriage and even if she is post menopause. Therefore it would seem that the custom not to meet or talk should be kept even by a second marriage.

It should be noted that this custom is not an absolute halacha, and if there is a need for them to talk about something it is permitted.

Best wishes

Sources:

Y:D 192-1, 5, Pischei Teshuva 192- 2, Orchos Rabeinu 4 pg. 244, Emes L’yackov E:H siman 64 ftnt. 32, Darcei Tahara pg. 100, Livushei Oz 192 2 (1), Shiuri Tahara pg. 510.

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