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Jewish single female trying fulfilling the Pru-U-Rvu and trying to remain Jewish and creating Jewish family.

Question:

תולדת כח ט: ויקח את מחלת בת ישמעאל;
Re:
Jewish single female trying fulfilling the Covenant Pru-U-Rvu and trying to remain Jewish and creating Jewish family.

תולדת כח ט: ויקח את מחלת בת ישמעאל;
So Esau went to Ishmael and took to wife, in addition to the wives he had, Mahalath the daughter of Ishmael son of Abraham, sister of Nebaioth.

..This passage from The Torah does state very unequivocally, that there was interaction between,( and, apparently, the positive discourse), the children of Sarah and the Hagar, between the progeny of Itzhak and of Ishmael…

Avraham Avinu Family stories… Is it possible for the human being, for the human person to stay alone?.. Most likely not… when considering such a situational status quo from all the aspects of human existence, psychological, physical… It is also impossible to fulfill the Pru-U-Rvu Covenant.

A man being alone is totally incomplete and even at very many instances incompetent.
A Jew, a Jewish Male person is supposed to marry a Jewish female person… But what if there is none whatsoever around. Absolutely nobody…

And the afore mentioned Jewish man can not go to Israel, or any other place, where Jewish females might be, because…
Because, for example, his parents are of the advanced golden age and can not go anywhere… Because of the job related issues. There might be different very personal, very individual reasons.

This weekly Torah Chapter Vayetzei does tell us about the Family of Israel and, that twelve tribes of Jacob do have Four Mothers Progenitors. Our Four Mothers Progenitors.

…And the single Jewish male in the 2020s of the third millennium might be appearing in the situation, when there are no Jewish females anywhere in any proximity. But there might be very cute woman, who is not Jewish, but whose grandpa was Jewish. There might be other very intelligent and nice females very openly demonstrating sympathies to the lonely single Jewish male. Some of those very decent and clever, intelligent women might have some Jewish background (maternal, or paternal grandfather, for example), others might not what so ever. But staying single and searching for the Jewish wife, where it is impossible to find any… it can bring any Jewish person onto the edge of the abyss. As the ancient saying of the East does go: “It is impossible to find black cat in the dark room, especially, when there is none in there”. Of course, humans are not the cat people, like characters from the eponymous movie… But one would not find wild strawberry blooming in the ice crevices of the North Pole…

Dear Rabbonim of the Din Online…
According to the Halaha and to the Covenants of Torah, the Jewish male is being allowed to marry non Jewish woman, or even get affiliated with the Ishmaelite tradition (for example, in Saudi Arabia, or in UAE, or in Bahrain, or in Oman)? And conduct matrimonial relationships with the partially Jewish females, or non – Jewish females, with the intent of creating the family of unity and fulfilling the Covenant of Pru-U-Rvu and also with the intent and hope, that the next wife would be ethnic Jewish? Probably, of course, not from the Jewish religious Orthodox milieu, but from the ethnic Jewish family residing in the area, or the Jewish female searching scientist – convert to the Islam…
Of course, it is a very and highly theoretical and hypothetical situation… But… But…

Would be such “polygamous” Jewish family (husband – ethnic Jewish, some of the wives – ethnic Jewish, others – Zera Israel, but all very decent and intelligent personalities) from / after the sojourn in the Ishmaelite tradition be allowed to return back into Judaism? Although, of course, “polygamy” is prohibited in the Jewish tradition…. And it is not the appropriate word at all to explain and personify the possible rescuing path of the Pru-U-Rvu Covenant.

…On Adar 15th, 5780 my Dear Mama started Her ascension into the Heavenly Kingdom… And my Mama was the whole World for me, the Whole Jewish Universe. We were very close, amongst many other things, doing so many activities together, like going porcini hunting, having meals together, going to the cinema… And in four days, very very very unexpectedly Mutti disappeared, passed away… Right on my eyes and hands… Starting from end April 2020 for quite some time, I thought, that I started stuttering, the fingernails did not grow for six weeks on my hands, I was also getting very afraid, that I start getting involuntary urinations… All of my Dear Mama “friends”, who were also my
I, 47 years of age, previously totally healthy person… I remembered, how my Great Uncle Boris was living through His illness… I thought and sensed, that I might be falling into the abyss… fleeting into the dark, dead end, into the no return tunnel. With the absolutely clear mind, but with the soul, who started shifting and fluttering into the dreary unpredictable directions… Like my one self psycho commenced getting crumbled and got very exhausted, started dragging itself and juggling with itself… (I don’t use any drugs, neither drink alcohol, or smoke).

…I would dare to say, that if I were married with one, or more wives, this huge open trauma of my Dear Mutti not being in this world with me any longer… I would not be circling the edge of the abyss in those darkest horrible hours and days. Probably, I would not… Or I would, but not in such horrifying torment of loosing the ground under the feet… If… If… If…
The female heart of my wife (or the wives – in plural) would be supporting me in this ordeal. Would it?.. Most likely, yes, it would.

I must abstragate from the thoughts and emotions of the personal character and formulate my question very clearly:

1. For the purpose of fulfilling the Covenant Pru-U-Rvu (and also maintaining mental and psychological health) the Jewish male is allowed to conclude marital relationships with several females of some Jewish background (but not Jewish), or from the non Jewish background? In the situation, when there are no Jewish females around? Also, as the gesture of Good Will and courtesy to those females, who are very pronouncedly sympathetic towards the given Jewish male. Granting the females the marital status of the wife. In the Ishmaelite tradition of Saudi Arabia, for example?
2. If this would be the Jewish family (husband ethnic Jewish, wives – Zera Israel and ethnic Jewish on the maternal side)… Would be such Jewish community socius be allowed to reenter Judaism from the Ishmaelite tradition?

Thank You very much for reading my letter and considering this question.

Shabbat shalom,
Ba Kavod Rav – Yours Sincerely,

 

Answer:

From you letter it is clear that you went thru a terrible trauma with your beloved late mother’s passing. Being an older single without a mother is very, very difficult, and I wish that you should merit finding your bashert very soon.
Regarding your question, I have a few comments. The first is that we cannot being proof from the people in the Torah as to whom we may marry, because they lived before the Torah was given to us, and because the idea of marrying a Jew didn’t exist. There weren’t any Jews yet.
After the Torah was given we were given clear guidelines and instructions as to who we may or may not marry. The Torah tells us very clearly not to intermarry. The Torah tells us Devarim 7-3, “Do not marry them, don’t give your daughter to their son and don’t take their son for your daughter”. It is true, marrying and procreating is a big mitzva, however it does not permit us to violate clear negative commandments. May a man marry his sister in order to procreate? No. We are commanded to marry within the permitted bounds. Part of these boundaries are to specifically marry a Jewish woman. Marrying a non Jewish woman, means that the man is forfeiting his progeny the privilege of being Jewish, the participation in Moshiach and the portion in the world to come, that Jews are privileged to get. Additionally, a person who intermarries, is destroying the future of Klal Yisroel, because the Jews cannot exist if they would be considered Jews at all!
A woman who doesn’t have a Jewish mother is not Jewish even if her father and grandfather were all Jewish. There is no such thing as being partially Jewish, you are either Jewish or not.
Again I understand that you are in a very difficult situation, and perhaps we should both daven that Hashem change things for the better for you, and send you a suitable Jewish girl that you can build a proper Jewish home together. We have to look for other options, and ways to find you a shidduch, and not by marrying a gentile woman.
May Hashem send you your zivug hagun soon.

 

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1 Comment

  1. Dear Rabbonim of Beis Hora’a:

    Thank You very much for Your answer. It is elucidating. And let’s hope Your well wishes would come true!
    Ba kavod rav,
    Pinkhas Frizen

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