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Wedding of kallah whose father was niftar


My daughter is Iyh getting married. My husband ( her father) is niftar as well as both her grandfathers- who gives her a bracha after the bedekan?
She wants me alone to walk her down to the chuppah. She does not want her brother to join us. She says “he is not my father.”
Is this ok?




You can give her the bracha. You can do it after the men leave, when it is quiet and you can concentrate on the bracha that you give her. Additionally, the choson’s father can give her a bracha, (of course without putting his hands on her head)

Regarding the other question, I understand that she feels that here is no one who can take the place of her father, which is true, and IY”H your husband’s neshoma will be there, when she walks down to the chuppah. Nevertheless, there is a minhag, that a married couple in their first marriage, walk the choson and kallah down to the chuppah. This is done not as a show of who raised them, of as a sign of who is important in her life, rather, as a good sign. The sister in law can walk slightly behind, to the side of you, and her husband on the other side. Additionally, you can have all the other siblings walk down in back of them. This way it looks like all the siblings are walking you down and not just this brother.

This is a technical point, and when she walks down to the chuppah , she will be concentrating on her davening to Hashem, that IY”H she should be blessed with a good marriage, and healthy, G-d fearing children, and that Hashem should bless their home with everything it needs.

They should be zoche to build a bayis ne’eman b’Yisroel.


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1 Comment

  1. Wow! I really started tearing up, both by the question and by the answer. Hashem should give the Kallah and her Chosson true happiness, health, wealth, Nachas, and real clossness to Him.

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