Question:
This past Shabbos I was learning pirkei avos 1:5 and it says that men will get gehenom for idle chatter with his wife, but shouldn't the wife get a punishment for idle chatter also?
Answer:
Hello,
If the woman is not talking lashon hora, or other forbidden forms of speech why can’t she talk? It is only the husband who has this issue, as he is commanded to learn torah and not waste time from torah study (see the continuation of the Mishan).
When reading this Mishna, it is important for us not to misinterpret this Mishna. The term of the Mishna is not to talk, even with one’s wife, “too much”. Whatever is needed for a husband to talk to his wife is important, whether it is about the house their lives, or even if it is conversation about unimportant things, but it binds the two together, and enhances their relationship. This is not considered excess, rather very much needed conversation, which a husband and wife should have. The Mishna is referring to talk that is unproductive, that is a waste of time.
Best wishes
Sources:
רש"י מסכת אבות פרק א משנה ה
תרבה שיחה עם האשה. ואפי' היא אשתך לפי שאתה מתבטל מדברי תורה
