Question:
Hello Rabbi,
Recently I have been experiencing unwanted homo inclinations that have been bothering me. I try to direct my unholy thoughts to those of the torah, but I struggle. Do you have any advice how to direct this thoughts to service of Hashem and study of the Torah?
Thank you.
Answer:
Hello,
Your struggle is understandable, and it isn’t easy. However you are doing exactly what you should be doing, combatting your yetzer hora. Try directing your thoughts to Torah ones, however with one change. Don’t think about not thinking about what you are thinking about, don’t fight the thoughts. This will only cause you to think about them even more. For example, when was he last time you thought about a purple elephant… you never did. But if I were to tell you every 5 seconds, don’t think about a purple elephant, you won’t stop thinking about it. It is the same with our yetzer hora, gently involve yourself with Torah thoughts without, actively fighting your yetzer hora.
Aside from this, you should daven to Hashem to help you, it works, (not instantly, but if you will look back over time, you will see that it helped.)
There is another thing that one can do, and this applies whenever a person is having improper thoughts, which is a segula from the Shela Hakadosh, to rub your right hand over your forehead, and say the posuk לב טהור ברא לי אלוקים .... Repeat this 3 times. (By the way, not that the Shela need my recommendations ,but I tried it and it works).
Best wishes
Sources:
Kitzur Shela Hakadosh pg 49, Eliyahu Rabba, Orach Chaim 98-1,Yalkut Meam Loez Parshas Eikev pg, 531
