Question:
Hi, I am wondering why I am not allowed to hold my wife’s hand to provide emotional support while she is giving birth, but a doula can get in a car on Shabbat and drive to her in order to provide emotional support.
Answer:
Hello,
Good question. The difference is that, the prohibition of touching one’s wife while she is a nidda, is included in the prohibitions of arayos, ( forbidden relationships), to which the rule of “yehareg v’al yaavor” applies. Shabbos however is permitted for a person, who is in a life-threatening situation, and a woman giving birth, in a life-threatening situation. When a husband holds his wife’s hand, it isn’t the same as a nurse holding her hand, it is her husband holding her hand. Therefore, it isn’t just emotional support it is the physical-emotional closeness, which is considered arayos when one’s wife is a nida.
Best wishes
