Question:
Is writing always a problem? Trying to become more observant, kids end up missing a lot of activities - parties, sports, arts as many are scheduled over Shabbos. One of my kids has a math competition coming up - we are able to get there without driving, it will definitely involve writing though. I worry if my kids will end up hating Shabbat (G-d forbid) because of the different things they end up missing out on. I grew up not religious so some of these decisions are difficult, and we don’t keep Shabbat perfectly at home but hopefully moving in the right direction.
Answer:
Hello,
It is wonderful that you are moving in the right direction. Yes, there will be plenty of things to overcome, but it will be well worth your while. While writing is always a problem, you also don’t want your kids feeling that they are missing out, because of Shabbos. There is an aspect about Shabbos, that is also very important for you and your children to understand. While there are many things that we don’t do on Shabbos, that is not all that Shabbos stands for. Shabbos is meant to be a day of pleasure and enjoyment, and this is something that you have to develop, and the message has to be given over to your children. That while Shabbos is important, it is also a time for us to enjoy the family, to eat special foods, and to spend quality time at home.
Another idea, is that it would be helpful for you to go to families that keep Shabbos in a different area, this way your son won’t feel as bad that he is missing the competition, etc. He should also be rewards handsomely, ( a special trip, or to buy his something, etc.) for his inner strength, in overcoming this difficult obstacle.
Additionally, if there is someone or an organization that is helping you become more religious, it is a good idea to discuss this issue with them. They may have the resources, and ideas to help you ease the transition, and make it easier for you and your children.
If there is anything else that we can help out with, of if you need more ideas, don’t hesitate to reach out to us.
Best wishes
