Question:
My elderly mother asked me to pay her bills and take care of paying rent ect. do her short term memory loss. My brother who has no job frequently asks her for large sums of money and she agrees. She doesn't realize how much it takes away from money that she needs for own expenses do to memory loss and old age and just wants to make him happy. Should I not interfere and just let her keep giving and is my brother doing something halachicly wrong?
Answer:
Hello,
We can’t say that what your brother is doing is halachically wrong, because it is her money, and being that he doesn’t have a job, he does need the money. On the other hand, you concern is valid, because if your mother doesn’t realize, that she is giving away her savings, that she will not have enough money for herself when she needs it. But on the other hand, she might specifically want to give money to your brother, because right now he is financially stranded.
On one hand, it depends on who much money she has. If she has enough money fo he future expenses, and her giving so much to your brother, is negatively effecting you because she is giving away her inheritance, it is her money and her decision. However if she is giving away the money that she might need in a few years for her needs at the time, then you should discuss this with her and see what she says.
Just a word of caution, that this is very tricky, because it can become and major political issue in your family. Let’s see what she says, and then we can work from there.
Best wishes
