Question:
A talmid asked, if someone has become fleishig and now his parents offer him an hour or so later something Milchig, does the mitzvah of Kibud ov Voeim over ride the Halahchik minhag of waiting 6 hours and therefore may he be lenient and eat the milky Chocolate after 1 hour. I am talking specifically were the parents will get affended if not as they especially went out of their to treat this child with his favourite milky Chocolate.
Answer:
Hello,
He should not eat the chocolate, but he should show his parents that he is so happy that they got it for him, and that he is waiting until the time comes that he can indeed eat the chocolate. The parent don't really want him to violate the minhag. Even though they will be disappointed that he didn't eat the chocolate right away, they will be happy that he controlled himself and did what he was supposed to. Aside from this, the established Ashkenazi minhag is to wait six hours, and the parent does not have the right to tell the child not to keep it.
Best wishes
Sources:
ע' באר משה ח"א ס' ס'' וס"א, וכן הובא בס' אוצר כאו"א אות תקמ"ו משו"ת פאת שדך ס' קי"א, וע' אוצר כאו"א שם שלדינא כל מנהג שברור ומוסכם לכל א"צ לשמוע לאביו לבטלו, אבל במנהג שאין הכל נוהגים בו והבן נוהג כך, אם האב נותן טעם הגון לדבריו אז ישמע הבן בקולו, אך אם מונע אותו סתם א"צ לשמוע לו.. וע' מבקשי תורה ח"ד עמ' קנ"ד מר' יעקבזון בשם הרב אלישיב זצ”ל , שעל מנהג הנהוג וגם מובא בשו"ע )או הגדולי הפוסקים- וע' שערים המצוינים בהל' ס' קמ"ג-י.
