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Mechilla not wholehearted


If someone is mochel me and he “mostly” means it, but there still is some “kepeida” against me, does the mechilla work? I am not discussing a case where he does not mean it— that certainly would not work (and is not related at all to the general principle of דברים שבלב אינם דברים). My question is how much he needs to mean it? Do I still need to be concerned? Thanks.


Since he said it and he did mean it, that means that he was mochel. The fact that he still has some kepeida means that there is still something left, and it would be good to try to get rid of it. Rabeinu Yona ( Sharei Tesuva 1-9) says regarding teshuva bien adom lamokom that there are many levels of teshuva, and all of them have a kapara, however according to the level of appeasement and teshuva that the person did, that will be the level of how clean the aveiro will get. It would be similar to aveiros bein adom l’chaveiro. I would suggest that the person still keep up a good relationship with the other person and with time, even the kepeida will disappear.


Horav Y. Cahen shlit”a

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