Question:

Shalom,

I would like some advice about how important it is to be a virgin before marriage. If someone is not a virgin, should measures to taken to have virginity repair surgery? Also know as Hymenoplasty.

Thank you.

Answer:

Your question is a sensitive one, and the answer depends on the person’s situation. A girl that is still a virgin should make absolutely sure she stays that way until after her marriage, for a number of reasons. Firstly, because having relations with anyone out of marriage is for bidden by our holy torah, and is a sin. Secondly, when a girl has a relationship before she is married it has a negative effect on her future marriage. The talmud says that the depth of the relationship is biggest with the person who breaks her virginity, therefore if she has a relationship with someone else prior to marriage it is hurting her future marriage. Additionally if she isn’t a virgin it changes things regarding her ketuba.

However on the other hand, if a girl right now does not have her virginity, because of a past relationship, what was was, and putting it back is not going to matter. Therefore there is no need to undergo that operation.

Best wishes

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