Question:
Please explain how the birth of a baby boy during the year of mourning takes away HaShem’s anger from the family, and the source if possible. Thank you.
Answer:
Hello,
Chazal said that if a member of the family dies, the whole family should be wary, (meaning that they should do teshuva because there is din on the family at this point). It is compared to an arch, and one of the stones are removed from it, that the rest of the arch is now in danger of falling. However, if a son is born, that “heals the whole family”. My understanding of this is that the same way when one of the stones is removed from the arch, the rest of the stones are in danger of falling, but if another stone is put in its place, that will support the rest of the arch. After a family goes through in tragedy of a death in the family, everything is gloomy. People will look at life as something that ends in death, and it is a difficult feeling. However, when a son is born, and we now see that life does continue, and it is a cycle, yes life does eventually end, but there is new life that is created, and that life continues, that is a strong consolation to the family. The reason it is specifically when a son is born is because the sons of the family carry on the family name, (this is why they are called “zachor” to remember). Therefore, when the family sees this, it is a sign that they no longer have to worry, and that the past events have been (at least partially) healed.
Best wishes
Sources:
חכמת אדם ס’ קסז סע’ ח וז”ל “אמרו חז”ל א’ מבני המשפחה שמת ידאגו כל המשפחה, משל למה הדבר דומה לכיפה של אבנים כיון שנזדעוע א’ מהם נזדעזעו כולם. כלומר שמדת הדין מתוחה עליהם… ואם נולד בן זכר באותו משפחה נתרפא כל המשפחה”.
Additional reading:
- Gift for an Aveil
- As an Avel in the year for my mother, may I attend Simchas Bais Hashoaiva?
- Buying a new handbag during the avelus year
- Learning Mishnayot for a Deceased Parent During a Leap Year
- Candle after shiva
- Stand up comedy during availut
- If I buy a new sheital in the year of aveilus, does someone else have to wear it before me?