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Unfriendly ?


Hi Rabbi, why do ——— [native english speakers] seem unfriendly and (sometimes) even rude when you talk to them, and they seem a bit self-centered, of course there will always be the very enthusiastic and outgoing. But I feel that most of them are unfriendly. Is that true?



Personally, I don’t feel that ———, are unfriendly, or rude when they talk to people. In fact, many people from that country feel this way about some people for other countries, (which will remain unnamed, so as not to talk lashon hora about large parts of Klal Yisroel). In general, different people are accustomed to different type of etiquette, and therefore certain ways of expressing oneself, or certain mannerisms that people in one country will have, will come across as rude or unfriendly to people from another society, who don’t understand where the other people are coming from.

Having said that, it does seem in general, that people that come from cities or places that have a large concentration of people, such as cities, are not are cordial, and laid back as people that come from more rural, country-like areas. However, the main thing is that everyone means well, according to the tools that they were given. Many people from big cities, even if they may come across are tougher, are actually involved in a tremendous amount of chesed, and they show their care and concern for others in action. Everyone tries their best, using the tools that they were given, as the Mishna says “ועמך כולם צדיקים”, and your nation are all tzaddikim”.

Best wishes


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